Ranking the Texans’ 7 best Patriots coaching candidates to replace fired David Culley

The Texans fired coach David Culley on Thursday after just one season and a 4-13 record. If he ever worked or still works for the Patriots, he could be the one to replace him in Houston.

Culley got caught up in a horrible mess of minor talent while the Texans played a full season with quarterback Deshaun Watson inactive. His team played hard and had some offensive and defensive moments, but that was not enough to save his place.

Now it’s on the “brains” of Texans executive vice president Jack Easterby and general manager Nick Caserio to make us believe they know what they’re doing with a capable new hire. Given that that couple used to work in New England and because Houston has by far the least attractive of the eight NFL coaching vacancies for 2022, in part because of Easterby and Caserio, there’s no question they plan to bring the “Patriot Way” to Texans.

So here’s a stellar list of Patriots-themed replacement candidates for Culley, minus, of course, Matt Patricia and Joe Judge.

Ranking the Texans’ best coaching options for 2022

Look, this sounds scandalous, but so are Texans, in general. But don’t pass up Easterby and Caserio to give Belichick his best pitch to leave the Patriots. They could also target the moon. But it might take a ridiculous $25 million-per-season contract, an offer of sheer power, a mansion and a boat to get him halfway to retirement in Mexico. Wait for Belichick to respond by pulling his hood up and shrugging.

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Now let’s be real. Did Flores’ firing in Miami prompt Houston officials to fire Culley, knowing the former was suddenly available? Remember, he was reportedly the one who most wanted the Dolphins to trade for Watson. Related, does this mean the Texans are working to try to keep Watson, assuming he’s off the field? So many questions, which is par for the course with this organization. But yes, Flores is the main true candidate available.

It’s easy to imagine McDaniels following Culley and Bill O’Brien, who once also worked as the Patriots’ offensive coordinator. The Texans can blow up the old man’s web concept and create their web of younger brothers from Easterby, Caserio and McDaniels. In all seriousness, McDaniels is late for a second shot and can at least help turn the offense around for guys he knows well.

This would be an intriguing hire as Mayo is generating more buzz as the next Flores-style candidate other than Matt Patricia.

Son of a Belichick, this could really happen. Bill’s other son, Brian, coaches the Patriots’ safeties, but there’s a good feeling Steve is the one not so sneakily into the playcalling position vacated by Patricia and Flores.

He replaced Judge, who left for the Giants before being fired and has done a great job the last two years. It’s quickly getting a lot of attention outside of New England.

Do you see what we did there? Caserio worked for the Patriots when they took O’Connell in the third round of the 2008 draft. He’s getting a lot of attention as the latest young offensive star in Sean McVay’s tree.